第28章 竞选班长
一秒记住【笔趣阁】
biquge521.com,更新快,无弹窗!
【你和同学竞选班长,最后你成功当选,他落选哭了,这生边上的人都在起哄∶你看他都哭了你还当吗?】
【这时你会怎么处理?】
【先跟其他学校搞好关系,并一同联手把自己学校其他班级全杀了,然后再把其他学校杀了,这是秦始皇嬴政】
【把哭的杀掉,顺带杀掉他同伙,选女生当班干部,在班上设举报箱,互相举报反对班长的人,然后杀掉,这是武则天】
【把哭的人也封为班长,把全班所有人都封为班长……分全班为36小组,告诉大家一起实现一个没有作业没有上课没有罚站的太平盛世,并让大家头裹黄巾打出口号:学校已死,游乐场当立岁在下午天下大吉,这是大贤良师!主打的就是一个人人平等!这个人是洪秀全】
【跟起哄的约架,然后带上全部哥们去打架结果被人家全部打进医院自己被关进小黑屋,小弟替他当了几天班长,家里人把他捞出来他回头把小弟踢了自己当班长顺便把支持小弟当班长的副班长踢了,这是大明战神朱祁镇】
【把哭的,起哄的,隔壁班班长,隔壁班起哄的,全年级班长,全年级起哄的全部杀掉。主打一个只要我好不了,全天下每一个人都好不了,这是黄巢】
【给他讲个笑话,让他笑,然后去嘲讽他,让他哭,然后再给他讲个笑话,让他笑,然后再嘲讽……疯狂拉扯,直到他笑不出来也哭不出来,这是成吉思汗】
【设置学习内阁(学习小组),让副班长学习委员纪律委员管事,自己天天玩手机,这是万历】
评论区网友们纷纷整活——
“哭哭哭,把这个班的福气都哭没了!这是婆婆。”
“把他廷杖八十,用门板抬回老家,这个是张居正[doge]”
清朝组皇上太后积极申请出战:“找别的班的来教训自己班的,这是溥仪”
“向全年级宣战,给全年级赔零食奶茶,这是慈禧”
“封他为阿其那,塞思黑,要求他不允许离开自己的座位一步,这是雍正[微笑R]”
回复楼上“雍正大概率是写一篇长文章,论证自己当上班长是符合程序符合规章制度的,哭的人哭得再可怜也得按规矩来,选不上就是选不上,自己选上班长是民心所向,哭的人没像八爷九爷那样天天给雍正使绊子雍正是不会直接圈进的。”
唐宋版乱世江山亡国之君VS开国之君对垒:“每天尽量躲着这个哭的,不得不见面也哄着他,你私下里不断写诗感慨,最后这个哭的还是当上班长了,还挺欣赏你的——李煜结局。”
“你穿了班主任的衣服,彻底掌权,给哭的人和起哄的人组长、课代表职位,把班里打理得几乎是井井有条,众人都诚心服你的时候,你早早地转学了——赵匡胤结局。”
后世张献忠重现江湖:“有没有把哭的,不哭的,全班,隔壁班,全年级,全学校,隔壁学校,所有学生的家长,邻居,亲戚,全部sha掉的?我应该就是那个。”
“本班长要举报他哭,祸乱全班,罪不容诛!”
“对着起哄的人说:不要凭空污人清白---这是孔乙己。”
“哈哈哈哈哈哈!李世民估计是跟着一起哭,而且哭的比他还狠,他算是历史上最爱哭的皇帝了。”
“头一回感受到历史名人的魅力,太牛批了。。。通篇看完学会了:把他们都鲨了!”
李世民眼泪汪汪∶玩完了,名声坏了,在后世成哭包了!
转身向自己的长孙皇后寻求安慰。
嬴政∶这是我大秦的远交近攻政策啊!后世人果然善于学习。
还没起义的黄巢∶那是我嘛?
应该只是同名吧,我一个文质彬彬的读书人,腹有诗书气自华。不可能这么残暴!
清朝皇帝们∶我们清朝那个叫慈禧的太后,怎么能那么窝囊!
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